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The Blunted Sword of Damocles
All is well. The biopsy was benign. I need to see the doctor next year for another scope. I am being watched, I suppose. Otto Rank, a disciple of Freud, and a kind of genius — bedmate of Anais Nin — tells a story of his youth. Planning to shoot himself during a bout with Sturm und Drang, at the last moment he moved the weapon away from his head. He later observed, later that same day, that he felt so remarkably alive and vital; that he was again engaged with the world, and that the experience was more than…
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Self-Observing As A Defense Against Terror — Or Feeling Damn Helpless
On 7 July I had my second colonoscopy within 8 years. Supposedly I could have waited 10 years; however, the PA and I decided after a few words about the necessity of having it at all, to go ahead since I had initiated the doctor’s visit. I had no symptoms. I was being vigilant. After all, I want to be in the best possible health when I come to die. The procedure went well, the nurses attended to me more than competently, things explained along the way. I associated to Soylent Green as I was being readied and “processed.” I had a…
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Trains=Holocaust And Other Observations, Railfans
This blog will twist and turn because I have too much mentation floating about with regard to trains. Several commentators have observed that the Holocaust is synonymous with the scheduling of trains during the Nazi era. Cattle cars shuffling along track for hundreds of miles and depositing Jews into death camps was a daily fact. In fact, if I have my history correct, Hitler gave these cars rail priority over the shipment of armaments. Recently, after some consideration, I’ve decided to change the cover of The i Tetralogy. I discussed this with my son who is a graphic designer and…